Shark Attacks

This entry is going to focus on a favorite of mine - I'm a big basketball fan and I have been for quite some time (17 years for trivia's sake - you never know when someone is going to propose: "I bet you don't know how many years Adrian Segura has loved basketball!" You could win money.) and have had favorite players. The very first being Dominique Wilkins and his team, at the time, was my favorite: The Atlanta Hawks. After Pete Babcock, in his infinite ignorance, traded 'Nique to the Clippers for Danny "I don't have knees anymore" Manning, my love for a particular team faded like Manning's career.

I remember being mere feet away from Dominique Wilkins, looking for an autograph, and being heartbroken when he walked right by with the rest of his Hawk teammates at the Sports Arena.

If 'Nique is reading this, I ain't mad.

Dominique Wilkins still ranks very high on my list of favorite players - in fact I think he was the best small forward in the history of the game. He was that good - the NBA didn't know any better. Yes, I think he's better than Larry Bird... get over it.

When 'Nique retired many years ago, I wasn't interested in a player that I could follow as a fan. I did have a great respect for Mookie Blaylock's game; I spent months mastering his underhanded scoop passing and defensive stances as a high schooler. But I couldn't find a player that would inspire feelings of awe, in me, like 'Nique. The guy was a monster.

The NBA was boring...

But then enter a kid who grew up and played a mere 10 miles from my home town... enter Gilbert Arenas. His talent on the court is stellar - he's the headliner on the Washington Wizards - a deadly player, perhaps the fastest in the NBA. But beyond his on-court abilities, what I admire is his off-court persona. He's gives away jerseys and shoes that he, himself, buys... to give away. Areanas holds himself as the "People's Champ," and it fits.

So I was reviewing Arenas' blog to read something very amusing:

There Are No Such Thing as Shark Attacks

I know this is random, but I just want to clear this up for people out there.

There are these things called shark attacks, but there is no such thing as a shark attack. I have never seen a real shark attack. I know you’re making a weird face as you’re reading this.

OK people, a shark attack is not what we see on TV and what people portray it as.

We’re humans. We live on land.

Sharks live in water.

So if you’re swimming in the water and a shark bites you, that’s called trespassing. That is called trespassing. That is not a shark attack.

A shark attack is if you’re chilling at home, sitting on your couch, and a shark comes
in and bites you; now that’s a shark attack. Now, if you’re chilling in the water, that is called invasion of space.

So I have never heard of a shark attack.

When I see on the news where it’s like, “There have been 10 shark attacks,” I’m like, “Hey, for real?! They’re just running around? Sharks are walking now, huh! We live on the land, we don’t live underwater.”